Practice good hygiene

"Wash your ass.  If you must."

Juvenile

"You're quite the classy lady when you reverse that posterior."

Smooth Charlie

"My full name is Charlie Wilson.  I'd like to date you on the regular."

Because Valentines day is just around the corner...

Warren G will regulate

"Sixteen in the clip and one in the hole."

A message from Lil Wayne

"Contraception is a good way to avoid unwanted pregnancy."

Rick Ross is an accountant

"Three C's; spending money quickly."

Cee Lo makes a statement

"I'm quite fond of your girl.  Fuck you."

Ice Cube catches a lucky break

"Two of my rivals tried to shoot me, yesterday.  However, the police were present, so they did not."

A message from Easy-E

"I woke up quickly at 12:00 p.m., then I called and apologized for my tardiness."

A message from Lil Jon

"If you're not taking shots, please leave the club."